inventing a new universe is cheating
Hi,
Can somebody remind me to buy some groceries when I get paid? My stepmom is on this vegan and wheat free diet which basically is making me starving because suddenly the only new groceries appearing in the house are nuts and raisins. They got groceries today, here is what they got;
trail mix
pecan halves
almond slices
raisins
pistachios
almonds
one butternut squash
spelt bread
Nuts are good to eat for one-two minutes maximum, then you are like hmm okay that was good, LET'S MOVE ON but there is nothing to move onto. Oh and in case you are wondering what spelt bread is; it is wheat free bread which basically tastes like regular bread that is old and stale and hard and maybe has a tiny bit of mold on it that you didn't see before you bit into it.
I made myself some crappy eggs and salsa just now but I am still hungry.
Okay you know what is funny when you are 17 and you move out and you are like Oh man this is so great and you are eating ghetto 7-11 hamburgers everyday and you are like wow! dinner every night for only 99 cents! and then one day you put salsa on an egg, on a english muffin and it becomes the most delicious food ever invented.
Was that just me?
Oh man, I was ghetto white trash. First of all we lived for two months or so, 6 people in a one bedroom apartment. There was two couches there and my bed was supposed to be a rotation between the two of them but it sucked because one of the couches didn't have any cushions so I always slept out on the balcony. Plus I liked the balcony because it provided "privacy" for me and my boyfriend to fool around. Whatever, because apparently it was cool back then for old ladies walking their dogs to see your dumb boyfriend giving it to you if you are one floor above them.
One day the boys went to the food bank and the girls were all no you shouldn't do that it is for real poor people! and they were all DUDE, WE ARE REAL POOR PEOPLE and we were like oh yeah, but then we were just thanks strangers for the viva puffs and the disgusting box of bread that never goes bad and the fucking halloween make-up. I am thouroughly nourished now.
Oh yeah, I just remembered another thing about how we were white trash because the dishes would get to be so many and the sink so full of shit that we had to do the dishes in the tub and it was like this big heart warming family thing, but then we moved out of that place we were like okay this new place is gonna be a real classy joint; no more washing the dishes in the bathtub and from now on if your bedroom is in the living room it will not just be out on the couch; you will have to make a wall for yourself using old coffee tables and milk crates.
Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that the other day on the bus there was this man and a woman having a conversation and I am pretty sure that they were writers maybe for r.p.g.'s or something and the guy was telling the girl that he was writing a new one and he's like same character, new universe and she's like THAT'S CHEATING! and also I think she had a crush on him and neither one of them was attractive and I was thinking about physical attraction to unattractive people and if it is like they become beautiful on the outside to you or if you are just lusty inside like knowing they have opposite sex parts or something. Also the guy looked like the comic book guy from the Simpsons and I told Ryan that and he is like worst. guy to look like. ever.
Also, I used to read fantasy novels like crazy starting in grade 5 and I used to mega obsess over them like constantly fantasize that people from another dimension were coming to get me outta here and sometimes if people would be like teasing me or something I would be all oh man just you wait till I go to another dimension and I would kinda try and cleverly smile to myself like oh pity the fool who don't know I'm magic. |
0 comment(s):
Post a comment
<< Home