goodbye houche and dack
I think I misused the word gamut last night and I am embarassed of the fact that I am not good at english.Today I went to the Micheals craft store because they were having LIVE! knifty knitter demonstrations and also supposedly this giant yarn sale. Anyway I missed the live demonstrations and also the"giant yarn sale" was totally more like the "not giant yarn sale". Whatever, I still spent too much money on yarn. Afterwards I went to this coffee shop and the lady working saw my yarn bag and was like "I don't go in Micheals anymore because I buy too much yarn" and then for some reason I go "OH, I HAVE A MENTAL DISEASE" and she got kinda taken aback or whatever but then I explained how I mean a craft buying mental disease and she warmed up to me a bit and told me how she is also addicted to buying stickers because she has a day planner and she likes to use the stickers in it and then I got kinda secretly snobby like okay whatever you can't be in my club anymore.
My tab this week was only 6 dollars which is an all-time record low. I also got a new job today which is good but also maybe bad. I think it is less money but probably better for a life and saving money.
Okay by the way it is freezing and I can't stand it at all. I have zero tolerance for being cold I think. Cold temperatures pretty much are the enemy of my will to live which is very retarded. I am sorry that I keep emo-ing it up on here but I feel like I am right now in some sort of critical battle in the the war against depression. I am starting to get back that weird feeling in the mornings like I am lying there flying a kite of myself. Okay, here is something I hate about myself; whenever I get crazy feeling I am all big on self diagnosing mental disorders. Anyway the kite feeling was reminding me of the word dissociative and I am like oh yeah whatever I have that disorder but not multiple personality, not even that bad just likemaybe I have mild version of that disorder. That is why I especially think "two me" jokes are funny and also why I want to write that whole book about branching off from yourself and then happy ending style comedically meeting yourself on an internet dating service. This is totally too personal for the internet but also I am sorta pffft that's okay I am ToTALLY dISASSOCIATED from writing this. I think the point is that I was writing to friends and strangers before I was writing to aquaintances so sorry, maybe don't read this?
Okay here is my question about all that. When I was a kid, like 6 years old, I used to regularly have this weirdo perversion dream that I was in this world where women all wore these kinda extremely heavy underwear like they were basically like this slave kind of thing; they were so heavy we could barely walk three feet but they were slightly turn on-ish gross perversion fucked up. Men in this world had these giant penis extendor things attached to their dicks and they kinda whipped the women around with them like basically we were always in the back of trucks being carted around. Also I can't remember how young this was but I remember that one day we were moving and I was all horrified because that meant moving my toybox which was this cardboard box in my closet and on the side againt the wall I had drawn this entire world of stickmen with dicks and forgotten about it. I was so ashamed and went thru this big effort to crush up the box and wrap it inside two garbage bags. I dunno how old I was but I was not much bigger than the big carboard box. Is that weird or pretty normal? |
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