putting the ass in class
At my highschool there was a creative writing club and one day I went to it but I never went again because the teacher in charge of it poked me in the belly on the way out and said that I was starting to get fat. Thanks dude. Good job on the telling 15 year old girls they are fat. Anyway whatever, the people in it were even bigger losers than me and I was pretty fucking low on the coolness scale so it woulda sucked anyway. The one die hard member of it was this girl named Colleen who was extremely annoying and used to follow me and my friends around all the time pretending we were best friends or something which we found kinda embarrassing because she was so fucking retarded. She had some boyfriend and every day they were breaking up and getting back together and she was always trying to cry to us about it. She wrote a ton of poetry and she was always trying to read it to us even tho I would tell her not to because I HATE HATE HATE when someone tries to read you their poetry out loud. The worst poem I ever heard was by her and it was called RECIPE FOR LOVE and it went something along the lines of take a cup of care and an pinch of sensitivity mix in some tenderness and so on and so forth. One time her brother set the chip aisle at Sobey's on fire because he was a big idiot too. Oh, another time we got him to buy us booze and then he got drunk with us and he walked around whining that he was having a heart attack. What the fuck dude? How about-No. You're not.
Anyway Colleen ended up moving out to Calgary and the last I heard she was working at this cheesy "bikini bar" that my friend Sarah worked at for a day.
The teacher who taught creative writing was also my english teacher and he played favorites and he really liked my writing even tho it was extreme bullshit because I wrote some essay about some gruff character in something or other comparing him to an oyster; all hard on the outside but inside grows a beautiful pearl of love, something really gay like that and he read it out loud to all the english classes and I was embarassed.
He got me to write a poem about youth for the yearbook but then forgot? to publish it and published the second worst poem I ever heard instead. Shit I wish I had that still. I might have my old teen lame poem I'll go look for it maybe.
Couldnt find it.
Amanda and I were talking the other day and she said that when SHE was teenager she didn't write poetry which shattered my worldview because my worldview is that every teenager writes poetry.
I am a ball of grossness that didn't leave the house all day. I took the garbage out and nearly wiped out big time cus it was so icy and I scraped up the back of my hand on the railing. That was about 12 hours ago and I am still sooking about it. I also am getting a flu and I can barely talk and I didnt sleep last night or take my nap today. Also I am sooking because waaa waaa waaa what should I do with myself???? you guys can tell me what to do with my life, as long as it's not POST NOODZ.
Awesome. B-Spotting theme song. I am the girl voice. |
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