steamboat to hell
So I worked tonight and stupid buddy that I fucking got it on with when I was trashed last week or whenever that was, was there and I was downstairs after work waiting for him to show his face behind his bar so I could get him to ring in these drinks and then after fifteen minutes he comes out from the backroom with some girl who he is hugging and kissing and stroking her hair while eyeing me furtively and I am thinking OH IS THAT YOUR GIRLFRIEND??? EVER NICE!
Fuck.
I hate it when people cheat on their girlfriends/boyfriends whatever. It is so spineless. Don't want to be monogamous with someone?...that's fine but have the balls to tell them. Whatever it might be like his new girlfriend or something so maybe he's not a cheater. It is pretty funny tho because I was kind of worried that he liked me because he had said that he only had three drinks the night before. Turns out he actually just likes girls who get easy after they had 12 drinks.
I think I might have broken up a marriage before. It is a long fucked up story but I will tell it to you. When I was 18 and kinda extra fucked up I lived in campground for a summer. A bunch of people that worked in the area all lived in this kinda field for the area staff and most people had a electricity and trailer but I just had a fucking tent in the woods. Anyway, I was over at these guys trailer and we were sitting around the little table playing cards and drinking. This one guy who worked security was sitting next to me that I cant remember his name and this guy jay was sitting on the other side. So the security guard guy is kinda copping a feel of a my leg under the table and I am like not into him but it is kind of socially awkward to be all hey stop and whatever I am drunk and half ass okay with it anyway. Then this Jay character on the other side of me starts feeling up my other leg, not really knowing that the other guy is too. We are sitting there playing cards and I am like dying of awkwardness because I am thinking what if these guys hands meet under the table but I dont want to like announce "hey both guys on either side of me who are feeling me up stop it!" I was really seriously dumb and crazy but anyway that's what happened and it was awkward but it was also kind of turning me on just because whatever I am getting felt up and my body gets turned on by it even when my mind doesn't. I had a bit of crush on the Jay guy too. Anyway I went to my tent or something and Jay came with me somehow and we were in there getting it on and got naked and he just puts it inside me without asking or anything and he did like three strokes kinda and I was just going to say get out of me I dont want to do this and he is like "Brutal, sorry" and I am all confused but there is line of his gross thick giz on my tent floor and then I get that he just came and he takes off and the whole experience makes me feel disgusting. Then a few days later I find out he has a girlfriend who he's been dating for 3 years or something. Following this whole incident he is king bastard to me and won't let use their barbeque anymore and is obsessed with calling me down in front of all the other people who live on the site.
Then a couple months later near the end of the summer I am alone in my tent and it is two in the morning and I am up writing letters and he comes to my tent and is drunk and is like Meliiiiiiiiissssssssaaaaaaaaa Please talk to me! so I let him in the tent and then he just rambles on and then starts trying to feel me up and I am like dude you have a girlfriend GO TOUCH HER! and I kick him out and he is sour about it.
Time goes on I never see him but next year I see an ad in the paper for his wedding to his girfriend whom I think is named Buffy. Oh yeah, he was signifigantly older than me too. More time goes by and one night me and Crystal go to Charlottetown for the night to get drunk and get into mischief and we are at this bar when I spot Jay and his lovely wife and so I wait for Jay to go the bathroom and I go up to the girl and say hey is your name Buffy and she says yes and I am I just say well "I'm sorry to just tell you this in a bar but your husband cheated on you with me 4 years ago when he lived here blah blah" Tell her the story, and just leave and go dance with Crystal. Then the guy comes up to me and starts yelling his face off at me being like who are you you crazy bitch?!?! I have never seen you in my life! and I am like Dude! HOW MANY PEOPLE DID YOU CHEAT ON YOUR WIFE WITH IF YOU CANT EVEN REMEMBER THAT YOU HALF ASS FUCKED ME DR. QUICK GIZZ!! anyway Crystal and I kinda got the fuck outta dodge after that and I have no idea what happened. The poor girl probably stayed with him and is still getting cheated on by a lame-o jerk off which is kinda sad.
It would be nice to get with a guy who isn't a total fucktard that would actually love me. I have an internet crush now because I am lame. It is not any of you love note hey sexy comment guys either so don't get excited thinking that a miserable drunk slut likes you dudes.
One more thing....after reading that story do you people think wow what a gross slut? Is that how men think? I don't get how things are perceived and I want to know. |
24 comment(s):
i'm not just trying to be lame here but you show a definite penchant for being a bad person. it's as if you desire to point out what's wrong with people. on this blog you only have negative things to say about people with whom you have had any sort of interaction including the people you call friends. try being a kind, nice, understanding person to people other than the random crackhead homeless person and things might turn around.
i certainly hope they do. your misery is not comforting -- maybe to anyone.
it certainly doesn't seem to be doing you any good.
i'm seriously not trying to be preachy, i know nothing about you other than what you write on this blog and the ways you have interacted with me.
i just had two shots of vodka on an empty stomach because i'm on my way out or i would never have written -- so there's that to consider as well.
an unloaded gun rarely backfires.
By
merkley???, at
12:13 a.m.
Merkley I dont think I am always a bad person. Sometimes I am. I dont think that is true about my friends. I do not have my close friends near me right now but if you would read on I just talked about two of my friends two posts down and I dont think it was negative. I do nice things for my friends as well. I talked about what I think is doing a nice thing for my friend even in that post which is making him a shirt.
I don't know what you mean by my misery is not comforting because I don't think it is supposed to be. It is only true. I am sad right now.
In saying the ways I interacted with you is dumb because you are the one who first just told me off for nothing and then called me ugly and boring.
I will be more positive in time. I think by the end of January because I am superstitious kinda and I will explain why later in post.
By
Melissa, at
12:25 a.m.
>Is that how men think?
I've done the copping a feel under the table thing (and that was with the woman's boyfriend at the table). Like most men in those situations, I wasn't thinking.
By
Anonymous, at
1:28 a.m.
well,
it's 4 hours later and i have returned. there were good times with a good friend and then that decended into a typical hipster coke party of which i was merely an unwilling accessory who snuck out the back door for a last call pizza slice. since i am still drunk, commenting seems like a rational idea.
I dont think you are bad. i never did. it's obvious to anyone with half a brain and a fraction of a heart that there is tremendous goodness and blah blah crap within you. the self destructiveness is the giant elephant on the dining room table. i know where it comes from, not because i'm some all knowing douchebag in a turban but because i think most of us know where it comes from -- including you, so i dont feel the need to delve any further and point out things that i'm quite sure you must already recognize about yourself.
blah blah blah.
point is --- it's all choices we make i think --- maybe not -- but i wouldn't be unable to function if i didn't hold on to the idea of free will. i think a few pretty basic behavior modifications on your part coould serve you well. what do you think?
honesty is lovely -- but not really necessary -- especially when conversing with a friend. no friend needs to hear that their shirt looks like shit or that their pimples are overbearing. our friends know these things. our friends need to hear about their shiny highlights and sparkling eyes -- they already know the other hardcore painful stuff -- they feel the pains of the other stuff so intimately that it hardly bears mentioning unless the intent is to cause further pain -- hardly a valiant cause.
i am very well aware of the inconsistencies in what i am writing right now, i am also aware that my self righteous nature can be off putting. i am only writing because -- a. i am drunk and b. because i actually give a shit whatever that means.
i'm no tom cruise -- i dont claim to have any secrets about depression or the medical aspects thereof, it does however occur to me that we have the ability to choose upon that which we will make an effort to comment.
this is where all the late night tony robbins self help cliches drop from the sky and crush everything in sight with a billion pounds of douchebaggery.
anyway -- maybe there is a chance you know what i'm talking about. there is also the very real possibility that i am completely full of shit. my intentions are good, i know that much.
By
merkley???, at
3:30 a.m.
the line: "but i wouldn't be unable to functiion" should read "but i WOULD be unable to function. i'm sure you already figured that out.
By
merkley???, at
3:33 a.m.
>no friend needs to hear that
>their shirt looks like shit
...
>friends need to hear about
>their shiny highlights and
>sparkling eyes
Does that mean the people I run to for support aren't my friends, but one of my shallow, back-stabbing bosses is?
By
Anonymous, at
4:27 a.m.
here, here merkley!!
word to the wise, miss angel - i wouldn't be so quick to point out other people's mistakes. sure, you felt justified in telling ms. buffy her boyfriend made a mistake. bad idea. maybe he is a serial cheater. then again, maybe he just had too much to drink and did something he wouldn't normally do. sound familiar? people often make mistakes. people often learn from their mistakes. people often go on to be better people.
besides, if i remember correctly, YOU took him back to YOUR tent and YOU got naked. if you want to lay blame, be fair to all parties.
this whole 'i'm a drunk slut' shit is getting boring . . . get over it already. move on. your blog is actually funny when you write about things that have some insight (like about your mom's dog). you don't have to be such a self obsessed 'tard.
because, believe me, looks fade. and then what will you have?
By
Anonymous, at
6:31 a.m.
woah word to the 'wise' anonymous, if you're bored don't read it and it's unnecessary to be such an ass.
By
Jillian Grady, at
7:40 a.m.
Ha ha I loved the story!
Also that would have made a great movie scene -- two different guys are feeling up a leg, each unbeknownst to the other.
By
Anonymous, at
8:41 a.m.
what is a merkly i looked it up in the dictionary and there is no meaning
By
NYC TAXI SHOTS, at
8:47 a.m.
it's not being an ass, it's being honest. which, i think is the great thing about miss angel. she is honest about what she thinks/feels even when it's not so super.
i never said the blog was boring. i keep reading because miss angel has a lot of great insight and intelligence. she is charming and funny. it's just sometimes i worry that she spends too much time dwelling on the negative. it would be great to see her happy more.
it seems some of her 'friends' are too quick to applaud everything she says and does and not offer constructive criticism that might actually help her rise above this poopy mood she's been in lately. i'm not down with that.
it would be great if she could focus her generous talents (photogrphy and writing both) in a constructive way. she has a lot to offer the world.
i know it's cool to be all disaffected and shit when you are your age, miss snailians, but at some point you've got to get over yourself.
i think when miss angel does, she is going to be one hell of a force to be reckoned with.
good luck to her.
By
Anonymous, at
10:06 a.m.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
By
Anonymous, at
10:08 a.m.
look anonymous
I dont feel the least bit bad about telling the girl. He did it twice. You dont dont know that I took him back to my tent either, he may have followed me. Besides, even if I did, it doesnt matter at all because I didn't know at that time he had a girlfriend. The guy was a wanker he wasnt drunk when he was an asshole to me all summer. The guy had four years to own up to his mistakes with her if that's the only time he did it.
Snailians is not being cool and dissaffected she is standing up for her friend. Don't tell her off
I am going to write about whatever the fuck is on my mind that day. I am not going to NOT tell something because YOU are sick of hearing about it. This is blog it's not as if I'm getting paid.
Don't say shit like oh your blog is actually funny when you are not being a self obsessed tard and treat it like you just gave me compliment.
You have no idea what you are talking about when you say my friends are quick to applaud everything I say. Really that is some retarded shit you made up in your head.
also holy shit people! you think I dwell on the negative too much?? Oh maybe that's because I am depressed, hey maybe that's why I am fuckin pills for it. Being as I know myself better than any of you I actually HAVE noticed and telling me that I dwell on the negative is a retarded thing to point out considering if you read my blog you know that I am currently seeing doctor about it.
By
Melissa, at
10:37 a.m.
Anonymous: fuck off.
By
Anonymous, at
10:40 a.m.
yes anonymous seriously go fuck yourself.
dont read my blog anymore. I dont like you.
By
Melissa, at
10:47 a.m.
here here amanda
By
Jillian Grady, at
10:49 a.m.
merkely
I will now answer you that I am done with anonymous.
Look, I don't tell my friends they have pimples because seriously the minute you get a pimple you are NOT my friend.
By
Melissa, at
10:53 a.m.
Dear Anonymous -
Please direct your amazing perceptive powers at yourself and check your own shit. Thank you.
Please also remember that these are young minds you are fucking with, and you'd best be careful. As Mr. Lennon said, that Instant Karma will get you.
Life is difficult enough without some rude goofball getting in your face. Everyone is struggling to get their own shit together, and sometimes the path they need to take is a somewhat public one. That doesn't mean you have the right to criticize - especially if you are too chicken shit to identify yourself.
For chrissakes, leave the poor girl alone.
By
Christiane, at
11:08 a.m.
I think it is awesome that you told his wife. If I were in her situation, I wouldn't want to later find out that I was stupid and that my husband was cheating on me all along. It was a long enough time period in between as it is. I don't think it's cool when people cheat, so maybe he's learned his lesson.
I wouldn't call you a gross slut.
By
Anonymous, at
10:50 p.m.
You wanna go camping with me next summer?
By
Anonymous, at
4:11 p.m.
hilarious
By
Melissa, at
5:09 p.m.
"they wouldnt b my friend if they had a pimple" PLEASE tell me you said that in jest...if not,thats lameass.
ALCOHOL & ANTI-DEPRESSANTS are not supposed to be used together !!!!!! Alcohol is a depressant.They dont cancel each other out either,they seriously fuck up your neuro-transmitters.Drinking & taking them make you tons more depressed than if you werent taking anti-depressants at all.
By
Anonymous, at
8:25 a.m.
personally,i dont think you're a gross slut,drunken slut would fit better.
By
Anonymous, at
9:43 a.m.
umm silvercharm
of course it is a joke
my doctor kinda just said that it makes it harder for the pills to work....
thanks caffeinkid you're a doll.
By
Melissa, at
10:23 a.m.
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