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Here are some successful internet dating techniques. I didn't know it until recently but I actually run a very successful dating service.
1. When you go to meet your internet lover you need to be aware that you might not like eachother so just in case that happens it is a good idea to pretend like you are actually visiting someone else. Make sure this friend is totally disposable because if things work out you will actually just be using this person's house as a bag storage facility and they might be a little upset.
2. You have a short amount of time to bond with your new lover. Nothing brings two people closer than alienating other people. Do this by accusing people of being after your date, especially if your date is their friend who they introduced you to.
3. Guilty feelings can be pesky; this is why it is excellent to lie a whole bunch to yourself and others. For example when you are ditching your friend after getting free stuff off her all week instead of saying "OKAY BYE!" say "WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS?" that way if your friend doesnt say "well my plans are to follow you around and sit in a room by myself where I can listen to you guys get it on" you are officially in the clear to say "hey I didn't leave you, I asked you what you are doing". |
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