sad dances with horney widows
I wish my living room were ground. earth. I wish I could multiply the jasmine tree, line the walls with it, smell it everywhere I went.
It's funny to me to have flowers in pots and then take their picture in a mirror; like I was trying to make a garden out of two tulips I bought at the grocery store in the dead of winter. Winter when you need flowers and plants like crazy. I couldn't grow my own this year; no sun shines in here. Other people's walls block it out. I hope I'm Outtawa next winter.
I think I'm gonna get drunk and write poetry. I'm drinking liqueur from a frosted glass transferred to a little boys tasse. hmm......lousy.
Everyone keeps old letters in boxes-in closets-under stairs-in basement cases and underwear drawers. What's sad is that more recently old letters are being kept in abandoned email accounts. No more anxious sentimental sorting thru old papers when you move, all the memories you want to keep forgetting but not at the cost of never remembering are now being buried in a pile of spam in your old hotmail account.
I found the tail end of a letter to a boyfriend the other day. I think it was to Nathan but it mighta been to Jamie, I dunno. It doesn't really matter. Anyway, it was the end of a letter I had typed up and then printed off. All that it said was that I was gonna stop typing and write the rest of the letter out to give it an old world feel. Then I made a joke and said "I wish you'd give me an old world feel". I mention the story on account of my awesome joke.
I dont really have any new pictures. The other day I was kinda sad feeling and I was in my room in bed and so I decided to take some pictures of myself there for something to do and I couldnt do it. It was like so last winter or something. Like that song you listened to all one summer and now you can't stand it because the time has transended the the music. |
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